Brave Knights, Bullies, and Emotional Intelligence – I found this quote on Bookbot, (To give credit where it’s deserved!) on an absolutely inspiring post they put up with quotes about dyslexia, for example, one says something like “I don’t suffer from Dyslexia, I suffer from ignorance from those who think it is a disability.”
I really thought this one belonged with a post about the book, Knight with a Heart, by Ognjen Livada, here at FKB.
Children surely will meet cruel enemies, which is why the fairytales are so appealing and important, perhaps even more so to us adults. Where else we can find a friendly dragon to fight our battles (perhaps like Sam Dragon?).
In real life we need to find strength, we don’t have brave knights and friendly dragons, but we can develop our internal resources to become the knight or dragon we need.
It’s great to have supportive friends, a mentor, or family to help, but in the end, how well we cope in life will depend on our own internal strength, how strong a character we have. There will always be a time coming where we need to rely on ourselves alone to fight the battle.
Learning to Handle the Punches
I recently read another post from an inspiring gentleman, Jon Morrow, that did such a great job of explaining what and why we need to develop our inner knight or friendly dragon, I have to quote him here:
“At some point or another, life punches everyone in the face.
The punch may be hard, or it may be soft, but it’s definitely coming, and your success or failure is largely determined by the answer to a single question: how well can you take the punch?
Do you roll around on the ground, weeping and moaning? Do you rock back on your heels but then keep going? Or have you been punched so many times already you don’t even notice?”
– Jon Marrow
Jon does an amazing job of running a multi-million dollar business, without being able to move anything except his head. Amazing! He credits it to the emotional intelligence school of hard knocks, that is, learning to handle life’s punches, and emerging stronger. But the beauty of Jon’s lesson, is that you don’t need to go the hard knock lesson to learn to develop internal strength.
The Need for Emotional Intelligence Lessons, Finding Your Knight
For a long time I thought wrongly many emotional qualities were inherent (duh!). We didn’t have many emotional intelligence lessons back in the day, many in my generation now see the tragedy and results. Especially in the first world, where literacy and numeracy standards are high, and, as Maslow’s hierachy, mental health issues among teens have also rapidly climbed.
Maslow’s hierarchy identifies, that once we have sufficient food, shelter, (physiological needs) and education, we start soul searching, we absolutely need emotional nutrition.
Children need to learn emotional skills to succeed and achieve their dreams, and most of all they need them to be happy healthy human being!
Soft skills can be taught as easily as hard skills, sometimes easier, with the right tools, and it is never too early to start.
Some people have an aptitude for writing, some languages, others art, and people like me are rather technically orientated – while I love art and writing and music, give me numbers or a technical challenge, I instantly feel at home. Some people are naturally good with people, and emotions. Those people tend towards professions like nursing, or sales, even politics. Brilliant! And some are naturally able to handle emotions better than others, although we can always have help. Those of us that are not naturally good with emotions or people can learn them to create a better more balanced life.
Developing an Internal Knight or Friendly Dragon
While we might have external enemies and bullies, the real enemy is within. How we learn to cope with external influences will determine the outcome. If we make ourselves stronger, creating an internal knight that will never leave us, we’ll go into battle well prepared. And as my childhood (and adulthood) hero C.S. Lewis points out, there will be cruel enemies.
External bullying can be really tough, and if it’s physical, children must involve an adult immediately, but most bullying is emotional. And it is this emotional trauma that can afflict the most damage on children, it’s grip reaching far into adult life if the underlying issues are not dealt with. This is where the internal knight can help. It can be tough if the bully is popular and it feels like the whole school is laughing, but really they are not. Most of them probably feel sorry for you, but are too afraid to stand up themselves.
An internal knight can help a child- learning to gain self-confidence, become assertive, be proud of yourself, stand up for yourself and brush off criticism will help you feel better. Learning to caring and considerate and show your value will help others see you as a ???
The next internal enemy to fight is emotions – anger, anxiety, fear, depression, poor self-image. These are huge issues that can turn into fearsome dragons as children become teenagers, causing instability. Emotional resolution techniques like EFT, and emotional intelligence lessons can help children see themselves and others in a different light. They can help prevent bullies and victims, and emotional disorders that grow like the proverbial monkey on our back. Teaching emotiional intelligence early can help children, in many ways more than lessons in maths, science, and english.
An emotionally strong child will handle the punches in life and become a strong adult. While an emotionally strong child can learn hard skills at any point, an emotionally weak one won’t know how to, emotions will overwhelm and demotivate, or destroy relationships essential for creating opportunities in life.
Take a look at the lessons in A Knight with a Heart and some of the books we have below, and start your child on the path to emotional intelligence.
Help your children, children you know, or those you teach, find a helpful knight, or better still, create their own internal knight, to be there whenever life pulls those punches, that we know it will.
A Few of Our Suggestions for Emotional Intelligence Books for Kids
See all the books relating to emotions in FKB Emotions Category:
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